Last night when we spoke on the phone, after you
scalded me with the truth, I uttered my goodbyes several times but you never
spoke the word. We talked for a very long time, not caring about the phone bill
that would accumulate. Lately I don’t care much about jack. You said many things
but not the goodbye word. You see, this is what messes up my brain right now.
You gave me an impression that you love me, even though you were leaving me.
It’s confusing, given the condition of our severance. And why did you have to
tell me you are expecting this man’s child? Really it wasn’t necessary. All it
did was to rub salt into my bleeding wound. Oh, it hurts. As I write this, I
will not pussyfoot around, as I possibly did in many of our conversations. Your
words nearly asphyxiated me last night. I know I lost you. But losing you is
tantamount to losing me. You know this, yet you decided to fling me down this
dark tunnel...
In My Room/Office/Studio
"A writer and nothing else: a man alone in a room with the English language, trying to get human feelings right." - John K. Hutchen.
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